Why did you start I Am A Child of Divorce?
I Am A Child of Divorce was born out of a desire to help children deal with the issue and circumstances raised by the divorce of their parents. At a local level, this help can take many forms:
- A caring friendship
- A church program like Divorce Care 4 Kids
- An after school program like Banana Splits
- A mentoring type relationship
Unfortunately, in our experience in dealing with these children of divorce, many of them have no one in their lives to help them to navigate the stormy waters of their parents’ divorce. That is where I Am A Child of Divorce comes in. Our goal is to build a community of children of divorce and people who care about them to help kids who do not have access to a program or caring adults or who just need additional information or someone to talk to.
What’s up with the name?
One thing that we’ve heard over and over in talking to children of divorce, particularly grown children of divorce, is that they do not want to be defined by the choices of their parents. So, why then would we choose a name like “I Am A Child of Divorce” for this website? Aren’t we doing exactly what we’ve been told – defining kids by the divorce of their parents? We don’t think so. “I Am A Child of Divorce” is a proclamation – not of identity but of hope.
It is a way of saying, yes I Am A Child of Divorce, and yes that has shaped my life in ways that most people can not even begin to understand. But, I will not be defined by a decision made by my parents. By proclaiming the “I Am A Child of Divorce,” I am acknowledging the truth of that statement and the impact it has had on my life while at the same time proclaiming that who I am is so much more than that.
What is the mission of I Am A Child of Divorce?
Our mission at I Am A Child of Divorce is anchored by three “H” words – Help, Hope and Heal. It reads:
To help children of divorce to deal with the effects and consequences of their parents’ divorce by providing hope and healing through a community of committed individuals and other valuable resources.
Who should use this website?
Anyone who desires information of the how to help children adjust to the divorce of their parents is welcome on this site.
First and foremost, this site is for children of divorce. That includes children of any age, teenagers and adult children of divorce. We also include in our definition of children of divorce any children from single parent homes whether their parents were ever officially married or not. Ultimately, our goal is to help you, and you are the reason we exist.
Additionally, in order to build the type of community we are seeking, we need people with a heart for children and people experienced at helping children deal with the issues of divorce.
Parents are also welcome on this site and in the forums. We applaud your efforts to make this difficult time for your child as easy as possible, and we believe this site may provide you with valuable insight into what your child is going through. However, please keep in mind that this is a child-centered resource, and we moderate the forums and Facebook page as such. So, discussions about how to help children adjust to a blended family and how to co-parent effectively are welcome. Bashing your ex or discussing adult issues like how to get more child support are outside the scope of this project.
Who is behind I Am A Child of Divorce?
This site was create by Wayne Stocks. Wayne is not a child of divorce, but he has worked with kids for years and has dedicated his life to helping current and future children of divorce. You can find out more about Wayne at his personal blog (Dad in the Middle) and his blog dedicated to equipping others to help children of divorce (Divorce Ministry 4 Kids). You can reach Wayne by e-mail at firstname.lastname@example.org.
What are your plans for the site?
We have big plans for this site primarily focused on two main elements.
- We want to build dynamic forums which will bring together children of divorce with others who have had similar experience and with adults who can speak into the lives of those children and listen to their struggles. Our Facebook page is an extension of that effort.
- We want to provide valuable resources which will help children, teens and adults deal with the fall out from the their parents’ divorce.
Our forums are currently up and running, and we invite you to begin using those immediately and spreading the word to others who might find them useful. We will slowly and consistently begin adding content almost immediately. You will be able to find these posts on our blog page and also on pages individually tailored for Kids, Teens and Adults. Finally, we recognize that our resources are not the only ones out there, so we plan on developing a Resources page to highlight other resources which may be useful to our users and a Store where you can access a variety of books related to the issue of divorce.
What can I do to help?
The most important thing you can do is to engage with others. Engage in the forums and on our Facebook page. Let your voice be heard. Answer questions. Ask for advice. Become a part of this loving community.
Finally, if you have any experience in helping children of divorce and would like to help us create content, please send me an e-mail at email@example.com and we’ll talk.