Where Was God When My Parents Got Divorced?
That is a fair question, and if you’ve gone to church and/or believe in God you may very well have asked yourself that question since your parents separated or got divorced. Where was God? Why didn’t He stop the divorce? Why didn’t He answer my prayers? Maybe you even blame your parents’ divorce on God? Maybe you wonder how a loving God could let your family fall apart like it has.
In order to understand where God was when your parents divorced, you must first understand God’s view of divorce and His love for all people.
God Hates Divorce
The Bible is clear that God hates divorce. He hates all sin, and divorce is a sin. Divorce is one of many sins that God does not like, but sin is basically anything that God wants us to do that we don’t do and things He doesn’t want us to do that we do. This sin separates us from God and can hurt us and/or the people around us which is one of the reasons God hates it.
God didn’t design a world where moms and dads would not get married or would get married and then just decide to walk away. If you are upset of the disruption and changes in your family, you can rest assured that God is even more upset about them. If you are sad about those changes, know that God understands your pain and grieves over the situation you are in. It is not the way He designed things to be, but it the result of people choosing not to follow Him.
If God Hates Divorce, Why Did He Let My Parents Get Divorced?
So, if God really hates divorce, why would He let your parents divorce in the first place? The answer is something called free-will. An all powerful God could make people love Him and follow Him, but what kind of love or choice would it really be if you couldn’t choose not to love Him or not to obey Him? God doesn’t want us to listen to Him just because He said so but because we choose to. The same is true for your family. God’s desire is that families are functional and stay together and reflect the same kind a sacrificial love He has for us, but He will not force that on anyone.
Your Parents’ Divorce Doesn’t Change God’s View of You
So, if divorce is a sin and God hates sin, does that mean that you are in some way tainted by your parents’ divorce or separation? The answer is no. God loves you, and your parents. God knows that the divorce was not your choice or your fault, and it doesn’t change how He views you. As for your parents, God is in the business of forgiveness. He sent His Son (Jesus) to come to Earth and live a perfect life to die for us to pay the penalty that our sins deserve. When we choose to accept that gift, to accept that sacrifice made on our behalf, our sins our forgiven.
Why didn’t God Answer My Prayers?
If you pray, chances are that at some point you prayed for your parents to get back together (or to get together in the first place if they’ve never been together). So, why didn’t God answer that prayer? That’s a fair question. The answer is that God answers all prayers. He either answers them, “Yes,” “No,” or “Not Yet.” He knows what is best for you and your parents, and He always answers prayers with our best interests in mind. We might not always understand the answer, and it might not be the answer you want, but you can rest assured that He has heard your prayer and answered it in the way that is best for you and everyone else.
If you have more questions about God and your parents divorce, please feel free to ask them in the comments below or by using our Ask Us A Question feature. We are also available on Ask.fm to answer any questions you might have about God and your parents separation or anything else related to you family.
My mom said tonight that she would pack her bags where was God when she said that
I am so sorry to hear about what is going on in your family. I know how tough it must be. If you ever need someone to chat with or have questions, please use the “Ask Us” function of our website. The answer to your question is that God was right there with you. He is always right there with you, and your parents’ separation hurts Him more than you could ever imagine. God knows the pain that family disruption causes in the lives of all involved – especially the kids. That’s one of the reasons the Bible says that He hates divorce – he hates the impact that it has on people. God could have stopped your mom from leaving. He is that powerful, but he also allows us “free will” which means that we are free to make choices even when those choices hurt other people. God could have taken that free will away from us, but what kind of world would we live in if we couldn’t make our own choices. Could things like love even exist if they were not freely given and freely taken? Being free means that God allows us all to make choices, but rest assured that He is always there to help pick up those pieces when those choices shatter other people’s lives or our own.
My mom called me when I was at a friends house and said that my dad wasn’t coming back home. He went to Arkansas before that so see his other daughter. I cried the rest of the night thinking of school and what I should do and my grades have started dropping ever since. It’s been a month now and I still can’t get over it. My dad has started smoking now because of stress. My mom decided to go live an hour away because of her work and I told her to get a house near me so we can be close and she said that where she was needs her. But I need her more.
David,
That all stinks, and I’m sorry you have to live it. Trust me when I say that, while things will eventually be easier to deal with, it takes ways longer than a month to get used to these changes. You mentioned that your Mom moved. Are you living with your Dad?