I Am A Child of Divorce is a proud part of Hope 4 Hurting Kids and we’ve decided to move this resource to that page. This is a great book for children of divorce, but is also beneficial to a wider audience. You should be redirected in the next 10 seconds. If not, please click the link below.
I Am A Child of Divorce is a proud part of Hope 4 Hurting Kids and we’ve decided to move this article to that page as we continue to build a repository of resources for children of divorce and children and teens who have experienced a variety of other traumatic events in their lives. We hope that you will check it out there!
You may have noticed that we are now offering advertising space on I Am A Child of Divorce. As this marks a change in how we have done things in this past, it seemed appropriate to take a second to explain why we are now offering advertising space on the site.
Why Advertising?
I Am A Child of Divorce is a labor of love. No one associated with the site is paid for their work on the site. All time and resources to this point have been donated to the site in order to keep it up and running. As the site has grown, more resources are required to keep it running smoothly. Particularly as our support groups grow, we will need bigger and faster servers in order to run those groups. The advertisements on this site will help to subsidize those expenses.
What types of advertising?
Honestly, we are not sure who will request to advertise on this site. We will take steps to ensure, however, that no products which support divorce itself advertise on the site. You won’t see adds for lawyers, etc. It is possible that people who seek to make the process easier for children of divorce or single parents might advertise on the site. We believe that this is consistent with our mission and will consider these on a case by case basis. We love our advertisers because they will help to ensure the continuity of I Am A Child of Divorce. However, we believe that our first responsibility lies with the users of this site, and we will keep that in mind in approving advertisers.
Divorce is hard. When your parents split up (either by divorce or moving out or whatever your circumstance might be) you will face all kinds of challenges and new and intense emotions. The worse thing you can do is try to deal with it all yourself. This is now a burden that you brought upon yourself, and you shouldn’t have to deal with the fall out all by yourself either.
So, who should you turn to? In most tough situations in life, people will suggest that you turn to your parents, and in the midst of a divorce or separation it is important that you keep talking to them. Unfortunately, many times parents are not really available to help. They’re with too busy with their own lives or emotionally unavailable because of what they are going through in terms of the separation. Even if your parents are trying their hardest, there is a good chance that turning to them to share your emotions and frustrations isn’t really an option.
So, what about your friends? Chances are that you have friends who have also been through the separation of their parents. These friends can be a valuable resource for information or comfort or just a listening ear. A good friend can be a lifeline of sorts when you are dealing with tough times, and you are lucky if you have a friend like that. Many do not, or you are too embarrassed or reluctant to share all the intimate details of what’s going on in your family life. Or maybe you do have a friend like that, and it’s great to be able to talk to them, but they’re not particularly good about giving advice.
Perhaps you could try talking to a trusted adult or relative? If you can find an adult whom you trust to talk to and share what you’re going through with, that is an amazing gift. Many children of divorce have been helped immeasurably by an aunt and uncle, grandparent or family friend. Sometimes, though, people are reluctant to talk to you because they don’t want to be seen as taking sides or because they just don’t know what to say. You may need to pick an adult that you trust and ask them if it would be ok if you talk to them about what’s been going on in your life.
There are other options that may be even easier. There are groups available that will help you to process the emotions you are feeling and the things you are living through. Many of these groups bring together other people in similar experience along with someone to help lead the group to provide tools and insight into what you are going through. Such groups can help you to move from the pain and turmoil that you may currently be feeling to hope and healing. Look for a The Big D: Divorce Through the Eyes of a Teenager group in your area and sign up. If you don’t have a local group, or you prefer something a little different than a face-to-face group, we offer free online support groups for teens here on I Am A Child of Divorce. This 16 week program is conducted entirely online and will provide you with tools and advice on how to deal with your parents divorce/separation by engaging with a group of other teens in similar situations and an adult facilitator who is there to help.
Registration is now open for our online teen support group scheduled to begin in early August 2013.
This 16 week course is conducted entirely online with the help of a facilitator who review materials and coordinates the weekly online chat sessions. Each week, we will tackle one are of interest to teens whose parents have separated or divorced. This new program is entirely free and is designed to help teens find hope and healing as they navigate the complexity of their changing family. We will cover topics including:
Sharing Your Story
The Basics of Divorce
Drowning In Emotions
What Is Grief?
Dealing With Anger
Feelings of Guilt
Overwhelmed By Stress
They’re Still Your Parents
All About Change
Stuff I Hate
Siblings and Responsibilities
Avoiding Destructive Behaviors
Money! Money! Money!
The Rest of My Life
God and Divorce
Moving Forward
For more information on our groups, please visit our Groups Page where you will find a link to Register, a video with information about the program and a flier you can use to help us promote the group. You can also find a link to the complete schedule for the August class on that page. Make sure you register today as spaces are limited and are available on a first come first serve basis.
I Am A Child of Divorce is a proud part of Hope 4 Hurting Kids and we’ve decided to move this article to that page as we continue to build a repository of resources for children of divorce and children and teens who have experienced a variety of other traumatic events in their lives. We hope that you will check it out there!
Teen Between is a resource out of Ireland designed to help teens from divorcing families and to help parents and schools to help teens through the divorce process. Teen Between offers in person counseling services all around the country of Ireland. They also have an amazing website for teens dealing with the separation or divorce of their parents.
In the teen section, you will find articles and advice on how to deal with:
Many of the sections include specific tips and links to stories from other teens who have been through the divorce of their parents. The teen section also includes a quiz which will give you insights into how you communicate when you are angry.
In addition to great information for teens, the site offers information and advice for parents on: Continue reading
If you are wondering if your parents’ divorce or separation is your fault, you are not alone. Most children of divorce at some point believe that their parents’ split up had something to do with them. Maybe you think if you had behaved better they would still be together. Perhaps you wonder if you weren’t involved in so many extra-curricular activities if they wouldn’t fight so much and would still be together. Maybe something happened on the day your parents told you about the split, and you’re convinced that what you did that day caused them to split up. Regardless of why you think you caused your parents’ divorce, there is one thing that you need to know for certain:
From MU Extension at the University of Missouri-Columbia, this resource specifically addresses how divorce impacts infants and toddlers. Too many people believe that divorce does not impact these kids because they are young. This couldn’t be further from the truth.
Beginning with younger infants (birth to 8 months), this article explains that, “Infants do not understand divorce However, infants pick up on changes in their parents’ feelings and behaviors.”
The article also explains the reactions of older infants (8 to 18 months) and toddlers (18 months to 3 years) and includes special sections to address:
Parent-child attachment relationships and divorce
Encouraging infants and toddlers to express emotions
Reducing the stress of divorce for infants and toddlers